Section 54:  On Growing Older

It is probable for a person of my age my health is unusually good. I have not an ache or a pain, my voice is firm and my hand steady.

I have some strength yet and my mind is still pretty active. I lead a pretty temperate life, eat plain nutritious food, use no tobacco, liquor or highly seasoned food. Still I am conscious that the infirmities of age are growing upon me. I have lost the action of a younger man. I notice in writing my hand is stiffer, though my nerves are pretty steady; my eyesight is failing and I find difficulty in reading fine print at night -- have thought of having my eyes examined by an optician to see if I cannot get glasses better suited to my sight, but science cannot make young eyes out of old ones. I do not discover that my hearing is at all impaired. I notice that my memory and perceptive faculties have failed to a considerable extent -- names and dates I cannot recall as formerly, and the power of distinguishing faces and persons is greatly diminished.

The ambition I once had to get along and get up in the world has died out and I think I care far less for anyone but myself and family than I did forty years ago. I don't see but I enjoy life as well as I ever did and while not a philosopher nor a scientist to take pleasure in obstructions and the thrones of the day, I enjoy picking up the news of the day and knowing what the world is doing.

One of the painful things to an old man is the loss of companions of his own age. Memory often recurs to the associates of younger days and active life, and as he realizes that one after another have gone, a sense of loneliness comes over him and he is apt to think old friends and old times better than the present. It is true it is mostly on account of blunted faculties and the want of capacity in himself. But the old man notices the difference and not unnaturally finds the fault outside of himself.

I desire on this my birthday, and the sun never shone down on a day brighter or more beautiful, to record my grateful and sincere thanks to the Great Author of my being for all the mercies and blessings with which He has crowned my life, and I humbly commit myself to Him for the few years that may remain.